So, who wants to read some stories? [More new stuff! 7/9]

[Kee715]

Recently, I've found that I have a talent at writing, or, at least others have said that I do. Friends and teachers alike typically enjoy reading things that I write, though I usually see my own work as something better off for the burn pile rather than something worth someone's time. Me being my own worst critic aside, most things I write are done in class when I happen to be extremely bored and have an actual idea to work with. Now, however, it is late June and I happen to be more bored than in even the most quiet days in school. But, thhe other day, out of the blue falls an idea and hits with quite some force, providing a kick of inspiration towards a new summertime goal: I'll write something!

With varying levels of inspiration and a total lack of planning towards what I am to write, I started a few days ago just typing into a word processor whatever came to mind. After ensuring that it is indeed coherent-ish, I realized something: I have nobody to criticize me. I write not only for my own enjoyment, but for others to read what I have wrote. With no readers an author may as well burn everything he writes! So, I have taken a break from my inactivity and lurking to ask for criticisms and opinions from my favourite Internet community!

Anyway, here is the link:
http://goo.gl/fVTC6

If you cannot access it or something to that effect I'll see what I can do. This is my first time using Google Docs.


Also, should anyone wish to read the other things that I have written, here are some links to some of my older works in chronological order. Note, however, that quality varies:

Who Is Left: http://goo.gl/80Iuz
What Remains: http://goo.gl/Gtsfq
Crutches: http://goo.gl/pzdc1
A Father's Son: http://goo.gl/kefPY
After Life: http://goo.gl/ovVeS
Into The Pile: http://goo.gl/LLi9A

Please offer comments and criticisms if you have any, I can't become better at writing if nobody tells me what I do wrong! :p

[Grammatolatry]

Racist car. Lol. It's good- I like it. The beginning really pulled me in; you did that well. Just...where did the stray skateboard come from? Left me thinking " whut..?" I think you sometimes use big words when simple words would work better, and you sometimes overemphasize bits, e.g. '...opened the old garage door to reveal a very, very old car...wrestled the old rusty door open...'

[bobby 55]

Hot damn. That's not too bad Kee. I've got one teeny-weeny crticism. Instead of "whilst" perhaps use "while". Other than that....good job.

[Kee715]

Just...where did the stray skateboard come from? Left me thinking " whut..?"

Some kid/teenager forgot about it and left it there. And there it waited for some inattentive passerby to trip upon it.

.....I'l just go add that for future clarification.

I think you sometimes use big words when simple words would work better, and you sometimes overemphasize bits, e.g. '...opened the old garage door to reveal a very, very old car...wrestled the old rusty door open...'

If I write without all of those details the story begins to feel very... bland. Then again, I am a rather dramatic person anyway. My mindset is often "Why be subtle when I can make it into a big deal?" This mindset has proven very effective in theatre class.

Also, I like using big words. It makes me feel smart. :p

Hot damn. That's not too bad Kee. I've got one teeny-weeny crticism. Instead of "whilst" perhaps use "while". Other than that....good job.

Thanks. Is there a problem with the usage of "whilst?"

[bobby 55]

I guess they are interchangeable, and it might just be my personal preference, but it's too Olde English for me.

[Kee715]

I guess they are interchangeable, and it might just be my personal preference, but it's too Olde English for me.

Understandable.

Unfortunately, it would be a pain to go back and replace all instances of "whilst" and it would lead to frustration every time I write "whilst" and have to replace it. You don't mind too much if I don't change it, do you? My apologies if it's irritating.

[bobby 55]

You author me reader.

No man, I wouldn't find it too irritating. It's your perogative to write how you like. Nice of you to ask though.

[Grammatolatry]

I must say I love the narrator's poncy tone of...narration. That's another thing I forgot to congratz you on.

[Kee715]

So, amidst the ever-so-common lack of ideas I have accomplished typing up a few more paragraphs!

I will soon be transcribing other things I have written onto Google Docs, primarily because I need to keep them somewhere other than notebook paper. I'll link them here so that there's something to read between updates.

I must say I love the narrator's poncy tone of...narration. That's another thing I forgot to congratz you on.

Thanks.

[Edit]

4 stories linked, working on transcribing the others.

[Morpheus]

That Racist car is pretty good story, defiantly have a knack there. I am only good at writing scientific books. I'll read rest tomorrow.

[Kee715]

That Racist car is pretty good story, defiantly have a knack there. I am only good at writing scientific books. I'll read rest tomorrow.

Thanks, always nice to have a new reader.

[Kee715]

Okay, so after a bit of writer's block and some misplacement of papers, I managed to transcribe two more of my older works!

After Life, a bit of post-apocalyptic fiction, and Into the Pile, a post-apocalyptic horrors-of-pollution-on-steroids story. :p

I am going to try to add more to MindScape if I can get some ideas, no guarantees on how long that may take, though. T-T

[Edit]

YES! 1,000th post!

[carsonreed]

if your garage door is not good and want to repair garage door solution, to set your home door